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My answer to this common question
Hey bruv,
Here’s a question I received on my Telegram yesterday:
"I can approach women, but I feel lazy about doing it. Any tips on motivation?"
(If you’re not already on my Telegram, make sure to join. I host weekly Q&A sessions there. Here’s the link: https://t.me/MenOfSteelHQ)
Now, with all respect to the person who asked this, I’ve never fully understood this kind of mindset.
What more motivation do you need to approach a woman you’re attracted to?
For me, the answer has always been obvious.
When I was in my 20s, I spent years approaching hundreds of women in the clubs of Manchester and London.
Why?
Because I wanted to experience intimacy.
My testosterone levels were through the roof, and the desire to have s*x with women was more than enough motivation.
I didn’t overthink it or need someone to explain why I should approach.
The hunger was so strong that not approaching would have felt absurd.
Sure, it took courage—just like it does now.
But it was a simple choice: step up and take action, or sit back and watch someone else live the life you wanted.
In my teenage years, I had spent too much time sitting on the sidelines.
So when I moved to Manchester and got caught up in the wild energy of the city, I made a decision: I was done missing out.
That decision not only gave me the dating life I wanted but also shaped my career.
The idea of “motivation” never crossed my mind.
It was simple.
If I found her attractive and wanted to wake up next to her, I asked myself: Am I more likely to make that happen by talking to her or by staying silent?
The answer was obvious.
So, I approached over and over again.
Yet here we are today, and I see so many men struggling with this same question about “motivation.”
Honestly, I find it hard to understand.
I’m 33 now and in a relationship, but even last 2 years, when I was single, I didn’t need someone to remind me why I should approach women.
The desire to have s*x was always there.
If this feels unclear to you, it might be worth checking your hormones.
Low testosterone can have a huge impact on your energy and drive.
And given the global drop in testosterone levels among men, it’s no surprise that so many guys struggle with the courage and motivation to approach women.
Of course, this isn’t the only factor, but it’s one worth looking into.
If you’re feeling unmotivated and unsure why, consider seeing a doctor to check your testosterone levels and overall health.
(To be clear, I’m not a medical professional. Always consult a doctor for personalized advice.)
If you want to know more about this or need help finding a place to get tested, feel free to reach out.
Remember: live the life you want, not the life others expect of you.
Take action,
-MOS
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